My only son finished up a week of band camp a few weeks ago.  It was his last week of band camp. He is a senior in high school. Seems like just yesterday he was in 7th grade and came home from his first day at band camp and wanted to quit.  Didn’t think he could ever play and march at the same time!  But he went back, band and music have been a huge part of his life ever since.

Senior Year

Senior year is such an exciting time.   Lots of things students look forward to for many years.  But as a parent, I have to say, it is a bit emotional.   I’m so proud of my son’s accomplishments and the young man he has become.  This past week has been an emotional roller-coaster for me as I came to the realization that band camp and the first day of school were the first of a long string of “lasts” we would be experiencing this year.

Emotional Times

I have been trying to write this blog post for a week.  Each time I ended up in tears and blubbering.  So I would move on to something else and hope I could come back to it a little less emotional.  It hasn’t happened.

Before you read further, I just want to let you know that I am well aware that the majority of parents go through this.  I’m not the first and I won’t be the last.    But this is the only time it will be happening to me!

Last week as I was driving to work and drove past his old daycare, a flood of memories came back and the tears flowed.   As I drove home past the Canal Basin Park where we would often stop after picking him up at daycare to play before going home, I couldn’t help but shed a tear.  I loved having him ride to and from work with me.  His daycare was a half mile from where I was a teacher.  We had lots of wonderful conversations during those 45 minute commutes. Sometimes we would sing, play word games, trivia, listen to music or just talk.

Over the years I have stayed involved in his schooling and activities through PTA, chaperoning field trips, band boosters, and the list goes on.   As the years pass you are just involved in different ways.

Last night as I watched him perform with the band at the first football game of the year, I remembered when he was a seventh grader marching for the first time.  How he made lots of older friends in band and that became his tribe, a place where he felt comfortable and safe.  And now here he the older one helping the younger ones to feel welcome and find their place in the group.

Seemed So Far Away

All along I knew this year would come, it just always seemed so far away.  And now here it is.  The last week of band camp is over, the last first day of school is over.  I’m fortunate; my son has always been involved in lots of extracurricular activities so we will get to experience many lasts.  The last homecoming, senior night, the last football game he will march in, the last music concert, the last bell choir performance, last scholastic quiz  match, the last drama performance, the last tennis match, the last prom, and the list goes on.   This will be the last time for a lot of things!

I know I am very blessed.  Many parents don’t get the opportunity to enjoy these “lasts”.  Either through illness or death the child and the parent do not get to experience these special times together.   In some cases parent and child can’t get along and the parent can’t wait for the child to be grown and gone!     I’m so thankful that is not our story.

I hope to enjoy and savor every second of this year of “lasts.”  I want it to go so slow…but I know it won’t.  Time stops for no one.  We will be busy with the day to day activities of life and time will slip by.  As we celebrate those “lasts” we will be planning for the future with college visits, college applications, financial aid forms, scholarship applications and interviews.

As one thing ends another starts, one door closes another opens.  It is part of this wonderful life we are placed on this earth to live.  I know if things go as planned, a year from now, Neal will be in college.   Our house will be very empty.

An Adventure

Since Neal’s birth, our lives have been one great adventure.  I have loved and embraced all the stages from infancy, the terrific twos, elementary school, junior high, senior high and all that goes with it.  I’m still enjoying it.  I love being a parent and feel very blessed the God chose me to be Neal’s mom.

There have been and will continue to be times when I am upset with him or dislike something he says or does.  That is normal for any family with a child or a teenager.  No one is perfect.  But we will continue to work through those times and be there for each other as a family.

I know our time together is fleeting.  When they are in kindergarten, you feel like you have forever to make a difference in their lives and guide them in the right direction and instill the values you want them to carry into adulthood.  Then you blink and they are a senior.  If you haven’t taught them right from wrong by now, you probably missed the opportunity.  Now is the time to start preparing them to live separately from you.  To make sure they can cook enough to survive, to clean and to do laundry.  To make sure they know how to do banking, write checks, buy groceries, make change, pay bills. (If you’re smart you will have started all this when they were younger) It is a time to allow them to begin making some decisions for themselves and their future.

Being A Parent Doesn’t End With Graduation

The wonderful thing about parenting is you never stop being a parent.  You don’t get to retire.  Your role just changes.  I know in a year he will be at college and I won’t know everything he is doing. (I can just hope that he hears my voice telling him what he should do.  Lol)  As this current adventure of high school comes to an end, another adventure will begin.

For now, I’m just thankful that we are at the “First of the Lasts” and not near the end.  As the year progresses, I’m sure you will hear about a few more of these “Lasts” that we are enjoying.   I will be relishing every minute of it!

So how about you, have you been through this and have any advice to share?  Or maybe you want to share the perspective of a teenager going through this experience.