Part of the Senior Year activities includes college visits.   For some, this is an activity that is looked forward to for years.  For my son, it has been like pulling teeth.

Time to Visit

When he was in 10th grade and I mentioned visiting colleges, he said he had visited some at various camps and didn’t know what he wanted to go for and just thought he would probably go to Penn State.

As a junior, we got the same story, that he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do, probably engineering or something in the science field (not a doctor or dentist) and he would probably go to Penn State.

For those who don’t know, we live in Central PA, about an hour and a half south of State College and the Penn State Campus.

The summer before his senior year,  I mentioned college visits and was told he wanted to visit during the school year and that he had decided to go for something besides engineering, but didn’t know what and didn’t think he wanted to go to Penn State.

Senior Year

So his senior year starts and he was still dragging his feet.  Not sure what he hoped to accomplish by not visiting colleges, but every time I mentioned a visit it just wasn’t convenient.  He narrowed his major down and had a half dozen or so colleges he was interested in and even had a first choice picked.  Had never visited, but thought that was for sure where he wanted to go.

Still No Interest In Visiting

Still no real interest in visiting colleges.  So finally, I scheduled some visits.  He didn’t want to go.  In the end, we literally had to force him to attend.

The first college was one he had on his list but didn’t really think he was interested in.  After the visit, he moved it to his #1 choice.

The second visit, was to his #1 choice and he was hugely disappointed.   Although the location was great for his major, and the school had a wonderful program, it was not a pretty campus and it seemed dirty.  Perhaps it was just in comparison to our previous visit.  But his previous first choice was now down to about #5.

So I mentioned visiting another college or two and again was met with total disinterest.  In an effort to compromise, I said we would apply and see which colleges accepted him and offered him the best deal and then visit them.

A Mystery To Me

I don’t know what to make of all this.   Does he not want to go to college?  He says he does. Does he not care where we send him?   If I were going to spend four years of my life somewhere, I would want to be checking it out and seeing if it were a good fit.

Is he just too busy?  He is involved in extra-curricular activities, but this should be a priority.  Is he just satisfied with the school that he fell in love with?   What if he doesn’t get accepted?   What if they don’t offer him any scholarship money?   It is far more expensive than I want to shell out.

Does he think we are in a hurry to get him shipped off somewhere?   Nothing could be further from the truth.  I’d like to keep him home forever, but I know he has to move forward.  The longer he waits, the less money is available for scholarships.

Have any of you who have kids in college or grown up and gone ever experienced anything like this?   How did you handle it?

A Footnote

This was written in 2013 during my son’s senior year.  He has since graduated and is attending Juniata College, a private college in Central PA.  It was the last college we visited and one he had decided he didn’t want to attend because it was too close to home and he had attended camps there.  But they had an outstanding program in his major, they offered him significant scholarship money and he loved the advisor when we finally visited.    This is his third year, he is on the tennis team, in several extra-curricular activities and has a leadership role in several groups.  He is thriving there so it was a good choice.

But for any students and parents reading, don’t procrastinate on visiting campuses.  Do it early.  Save yourself stress and headaches.  You will also be on the radar for scholarships, etc.